HelpingOthersHelpThemselves

Counseling, Coaching, Psychology, Therapy

Getting Into Survival Mode


Silver Girl

Time To Stop Being Passive

Get your life back!

We all reach a point in our life when we need to make the choice to live. To really live.

We may have been through hell but it takes choices and action to get out of hell.

To get up and fight for your life, fight for your future.. to survive.

This is hard when you’re been in a long term abusive relationship or a dysfunctional family – because It’s hard to get up when all you want to do is lie down and you may not know how to survive on your own because you’ve always been controlled. You’re not a strategist and you don’t have the skills of focus, discipline, determination and commitment.

Survival may be something you have never had to do before – to protect and provide for yourself without support.

You may feel terrified. You may…

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Finding Your Voice


Silver Girl

Learning to Communicate Effectively

finding your voice

I wish I lived in a world where people could communicate honestly, freely, kindly and safely. Not just the nice stuff but the hard stuff as well.

Sadly that doesn’t happen in my world.

Emotionally dysfunctional families have problems with communication. They have all been trained since childhood by unhealthy examples.

They are either aggressive, passive/aggressive or passive communicators. Healthy or assertive communication has no place in a dysfunctional family.

What Communication Style are you--Passive, Assertive or Aggressive? - News - Bubblews

Children of abuse learn early on, that life is not comfortable if they speak the truth openly, that it’s painful to try to tell people what you really need, and that it’s not safe to talk about your own problems.

In abusive families everyone has problems and baggage, no one can hear yours over their own.

In order to survive and have some degree of peace, you have to stifle your voice, edit your truth, you…

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Words To Remember..


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Happy Full Moon! A beautiful opportunity for letting go… to make room for welcoming the new. Time to rise and shine.


Under The Blue Door

Moon art~ Ash White

“These are times of decision, of change, of choice….it’s time for something to go, something to be removed.  Anything that is inhibiting, holding us back, it can be a belief it can person, it can be a job, it can be a country…It can be anything that is holding us back. Now needs to go…it’s like we are being stripped of our known familiar sense of security, sense of identity, sense of who I am.”
“…So what is coming up now for so many of us is a new future…birth of the new always requires the separation from the known, familiar, secure past. It can be beautiful, it’s a flowering, it’s an opening, it’s a creation, and it can be very scary…”
“…Now is the time for planning this future, and it’s a very good time for doing that and preparing ourselves…the ship’s gonna leave the port, the new paradigm…

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Work It Out


Kindness Blog

American Heart Association Quote Photo Credit: American Heart Association

What would a new year be without a post about exercising?!  Before your eyes begin to glaze over and your mind goes numb at the very thought of reading one more word about get fit resolutions, just bear with me, as I hope to approach this topic from a slightly different and kinder perspective.  Are you still with me?  Good, let me explain.

On Christmas Eve morning, I found myself in a local emergency room being treated for dehydration and a flare up of ulcerative colitis.  It was the equivalent of a lump of coal in my Christmas stocking, and it definitely got my attention.  After being given two liters of fluids and steroids through my I.V. , I was discharged with a list of medications and instructions to follow from the attending physician, along with a long list of changes to be made by…

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Give a Smile


Think Positive, Be Positive

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I know how some days, it’s what I need…so gave a smile today and then some!!!!

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Ladies how you view your man will have an impact on the way you treat him.


Sexual Reminisces

On my opinion there are many positive qualities  missing in this poster. What do you say?

Male emotions

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It’s Not Too Late! (Really, It’s Not)


Solid Rock Christian Counseling - Rebecca Turner, L.P.C.

It’s Only Too Late If You Don’t Start Now – that’s not only a catchy phrase, but also the title of a very good self-help book by Barbara Sher.

But this post isn’t about Barbara Sher or self-help books.

This post is about the fact that it’s January 4, and you either:

1) didn’t get to your New Year’s Resolutions made before January 1st, or

2) you DID come up with some, but you’ve already fallen behind.

And now you’re discouraged.

And it’s only January 4th.   And you’ve decided that resolutions are stupid.

My response to that is “So what?”

So what if you didn’t make a list of resolutions, but really wanted to?  So what if you made them and really meant it, but you’ve already stumbled and broken one (or 3)?  So what??

Resolutions, or life changes, are things you have to recommit to every single day.  It…

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HRH Blogs #truewords


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More Thoughts about Self Injury — Kathy’s Video comments, Self Injury2


Discussing Dissociation

Flower Bush with Bees

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Self injury….. A frequent and common topic for dissociative trauma survivors.

Have you been struggling with thoughts of self harm?

Do you know why you need to self harm?

In this video, Self Injury 2, I ask lots of questions about self injury — questions you are meant to ask yourself.  Genuine questions to think about, because if you can seriously start to answer these questions, you will get some much-needed insight into your patterns of self injury.

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Self Injury 2, by Kathy from Discussing Dissociation

Self Injury 2, by Kathy from Discussing Dissociation

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A Bee in a Bush .

Do you see the bees?

There were hundreds of them in that bush, all buzzing around!

Why am I sitting so close to all those bees in the video?

.Buzzing Bees

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My wish for you is that you will be able to free yourself from the patterns and expectations of ongoing self-injury.

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